A Special Note to Our Youth...

I feel blessed to be the pastor of a GREAT youth group at McKendree UMC.  These kids are fun, smart, talented, and they love each other and love the church and love their Lord.  They've even shown me they love ME.

I also recognize that I only really see most of them when they are together as a group AND at the church or a church event.  I have a story for them tonight--a true story--happened just this week.  I am going to believe that I don't need to connect the dots for them on this and they can draw their own conclusions and life lessons from it.  People are watching...all the time.

I took my kids to McDonald's after they finished their homework.  We went to the McDonald's here on Main St in Lincolnton.  It wasn't very crowded, but we certainly weren't alone.

On the other side of the restaurant from where we sat, there were five young men from Lincolnton High School.  I cannot say for certain, but I believe they were on the football team.  Maybe Soccer, but definitely a team sport.

My kids noticed.  Trey likes to play football; Emma was a cheerleader last year.  They watched them off and on.  Soon, I was trying to distract my kids attention away from these young men.

One of them was standing about as far away from his team mates as possible--on the phone.  He hung up and shouted, "Sometimes she can be the biggest b**** I know!"  He then explained he was talking about his mother.  My kids heard that.  Everyone in the store heard it.

The young men settled into their conversation, laced throughout with language that I didn't want my kids listening to--especially from kids they looked up to.  I think by then my kids were distracted enough, they didn't notice.  The family with a small little girl sitting next to the Lincolnton High boys--well, they noticed.  From the looks of the faces in the room, a lot of folks noticed.  No matter how I tried to find some way to let these boys (notice, they don't seem like young men to me anymore) know they needed to settle down, I couldn't without drawing the attention of my kids back to the boys, so unfortunately, I said nothing.  No one else did either.  When these boys from Lincolnton High left, there was a sense of relief in the room as folks went back to enjoying time with their families.

Now, understand, I'm not foolish enough to NOT remember that sometimes a misguided part of growing up is the belief that to show maturity, we might just try using a few colorful metaphors sprinkled in our conversation..a mild form of rebellion, I guess.  So, to be fair, the language, in and of itself, was not the problem for me.

My issue was that they didn't seem to realize that they were not in the locker room!  My issue was with the lack of respect for those around them.  The boys certainly knew they were in a public, family place.  They should have had more respect.  Being ABLE to use more adult language does not mean that you SHOULD.  It certainly does not mean they shouldn't be aware of their surroundings and concerned about how their actions affect the others in the room.

Worst of all, for too many in the room, they now have an image in their minds that is (fairly or not) associated with Lincolnton High School Athletics.  Their language, their actions, their lack of restraint hurt more than just them, it hurt the team--it hurt the whole school.  These boys will be men when they can demonstrate some respect and concern--some awareness of their surroundings.

I guess I wasn't really surprised.  I was disappointed...AND I was disappointed that I wasn't surprised.  Oh well...

Just thought I'd share with you all.  Thanks for all you do.  Remember, people know who you are, whose you are, and they are watching.

Blessings

Pastor Tommy